How to Avoid Your Groom Looking like Donald Trump!

March 03, 2017  •  Leave a Comment

So this guy is in the news a lot lately and for all the wrong reasons.

via GIPHY

As he is so cartoonishly weird in his appearance and behaviour, the last thing you or your wedding guests want to be thinking about your groom is 'He's a bit....Trumpy!'

via GIPHY

So, ladies and gentlemen, here's a few tips on how to act, dress and what to not say to avoid those unwelcome comparisons springing to mind on your wedding day.

1.  Ladies first - Be on your best behaviour and put your lovely bride first.  Hold the door open for her, ensure she sits down before you do.... of all the days in your life this is when to be the perfect gentleman.

obama melania inauguration dayOooh, me first!!

2.  Don't be a meany!  Give lots of compliments all day very loudly so everyone can hear you and think you're a real hero.  

via GIPHY

3.  If you're follically challenged then get the clippers out and go for the buzz cut.  You don't want to be flicking through your photo album and see this...

Donald Trump bad hairSurf's up!

4.  We know some men are partial to a bit of fake tan now and then and the temptation might be there to do it for your wedding day, but just go easy on the stuff.  Less is more.

Donald Trump OrangeRipe n ready to peel!   25-People-Horrible-Fake-TansTango'd   orangeYes, an orange

5.  A tie is an accessory, not a compensation for something.  The pointy bit of your tie should stop just above the belt line, not dangling between your legs.

Donald Trump long tieCompensation issues   Donald Trump long tieMine's this long...

.....although if you're going to wear it long then commit to it!

jon-stewart long tie donald trump stephen colbertGo long or go home!

6.  While we're on measurements, make sure you get your ring size correct to avoid it slipping off your tiny hands.

via GIPHY

7.  No alternative facts (lies).  Best not to say in your speech it is the biggest wedding ever (actually, do say that, it would be funny!)

Donald Trump inauguration day25 billion people at Trump's inauguration

8.  Or that it's a fake marriage.  Probably won't score you any points.  

9.  You're going to be shaking hands with lots of people throughout the day.  Try not to take their arm off in the process!  Gentle but firm does it.

via GIPHY

10.  Be careful using the words 'Tremendous', 'Huge (Yuge)', 'Fantastic'.

11.  Watch those hands motions while you speak.

Donald Trump speechInsert here...   Donald Trump speechL for Lunatic Donald Trump Scotland golf course fingers swearingBack atcha pal!

Ok, it was a cheap shot at an easy target so we can laugh for now.  Don't forget he has the codes though....

via GIPHY

Peace out everybody, have a tremendous weekend! xx 


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